A week in Lansing

I've spent much of this last week in Lansing. Last weekend was Called Convention, as usual I set up the reflection room. It was neat to see the teenagers worshiping with such zeal. The irony was not lost on me, that as I struggled with restlessness and searched for direction for my ministry, I was tasked with helping students discern their callings. It was helpful for me, too.  I had been in a funk, questioning my effectiveness as a minister.

The David Crowder song How He Loves wrecked me the first night. I was powerfully overcome by a sense of God's love. Lines like, "All of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory," and "And heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss/And my heart turns violently inside of my chest, I don’t have time to maintain these regrets..." destroyed my funk.

Sunday morning I went to an early service at All Saints Episcopal. I found the liturgy and eucharist as nourishing as ever.  Then I high-tailed it back to Sebewaing and managed to make it in time to hear Elaine deliver a killer sermon. It was the first Sunday I had been in church without suit or tie.  I felt relaxed.

Monday we took off for District Council.  We happened to have booked the same hotel that I had stayed in for called convention. I had no luck finding a decent espresso the first time we were there, but Mount Hope had a surprisingly good shot, so did Deckers and Gone Wired.

I greatly enjoyed conversations with friends and the services. God was affirming and it was wonderful.  As Elaine and I were leaving, a pastor of a large church with many daughter churches and author of many books, a guy with whom people are impressed, said he thought we were impressive!  I chortled and Elaine said, "whatever." I felt such consolation on the trip home.  God spoke to me through Dave's words.  It was like hearing God saying "You are my beloved son, in you am I well pleased."  Nice.

Give me Sebewaing or I die

Ed Stetzer’s seminars at district council really have me thinking. He told of how John Knox prayed “Give me Scotland or I die.” Do I care that much for the people God has given to me?

Stetzer also talked about the propensity for pastors to have demographic lust and community envy. He asked us, can we pastor in a culture that we don’t really like? In a church that doesn’t do things the way we want them too? Is it about our preferences or reaching the culture in which we are placed?

Wow. We just saw the church planters line up in front. One couple is planting to the pomo intellectuals in Ann Arbor. I leaned over to Elaine and said, “If we move to Ann Arbor when I’m working on my doctorate, lets go to that church.” I don’t really like blue collar culture. I hate going to walmart. Yet here I am in Sebewaing. I know that this is where God has called me. He has given me as a gift to these people and more important to me, he has given them to me.

God forgive me. Birth in me a love for my culture - for my city. May I be able to pray with my whole being, “God give me Sebewaing or I die. Give me Unionville or I die.”

Steve Bradshaw set out slips of paper with the names of towns and their populations - places that had no A/G church. As I was praying and wrestling with my lack of love, I saw Bay City pop 36,817. I knelt down by it. I placed my finger tips on it, praying for Bay City. I had a burden for Bay City. What does that mean? What do I do with this slip of paper? Do I lay it on the altar and relinquish it to God, saying Lord, send laborers into this field? Do I see this as a sign that I should leave here and plant in Bay City or is it a case of culture envy? I knelt there, my fingers caressing the paper for many minutes. I don’t know what to do with Bay City. The paper I left there on the floor. I feel God calling me to love my people, to love Sebewaing, to figure out how to effectively minister to blue collar culture and then maybe my people and I can do something about Bay City.

Getting up from that time of wrestling, any doubts are gone. I am growing in love toward my community.

Adventures in Asceticism

This week has been an adventure worthy of the Count of Monte Cristo. This time, however, the hero of the story was not Edmond Dantes, Though he had his extravagance and dramatic timing. No, the hero wasn’t me either. God is the hero of this (perhaps every) good story.

We set off for district council with little money but some great assets. Brad Trask had graciously offered us Brighton Assembly’s Missionary House. As hard as we tried to share the blessing, we couldn’t find anyone else to stay with us, so we had this big beautiful house to ourselves. Our parents were going to stay at FaHoLo campground in Grass Lake and watch our kids in their bus.

We thought if worse came to worse we could buy some food with our foodstamps and cook back at the missionary house. But we ha a problem there. I had cracked the card a few weeks back and Elaine called for a replacement. The card didn’t come until we had left. So the cash we had on hand was all there was. We were stressed, but we determined to trust God.

We went down to the campground Sunday night. Elaine and I were in the midst of a three day fast anticipating what God would do in us through ordination, so we only had to feed the kids. The next day we dropped off my suits at a dry cleaner (One Hour Martinizing which is no longer one hour, we were extremely lucky they let us have one day service.) That took the last of our money. In fact I had to borrow a dollar from money I had brought to restock the coffeehouse.

Later that day I had coffee with Professor Mojo, and classmates, Joe and Christy. We talked about St. Francis and other things spiritual. I was so hyped up on caffeine courtesy of Live Wired Coffeehouse (R&D) that I was talking a mile a minute. Christy prayed for us, that God would provide the money to get us back home. Will all our talk about St. Francis I was soon to find the joy of his simplicity and relinquishment.

That night my parents got in. They decided to celebrate our anniversary (a month early) and we went to the grocery store for supplies and a desert. They then wanted to get a pizza. We drove all around Jackson to find a place that was open. My parents felt so bad that they filled our tank for us! Then back at the bus we had desert and opened a card with a gift of $25!

Armed with gas and $25 we headed to council. Tuesday was our ordination luncheon and rehearsal. That night was the banquet we had already paid for, so our meals were covered for this day. Dave Williams laughed at the luncheon that he had intended to send us $100 after reading some comments we had posted about our desire to trust God with our finances and become even more generous. He was so tickled that we didn’t act like victims of our economy. We laughed with him, we thought it was silly, but nice, of him to think of sending $100 to us.

Wednesday was the offering for pastor appreciation - our pastor, the pastor’s pastor, Bill Leach. God had already given us a tank of gas and money. He was great! Elaine pulled the $20 bill out of the envelop with a sly delighted look in her eye. I nodded with a grin. The offering went by and we had $5 left.

The next day was the home missions service, where we celebrate church planting and other missions here at home. We love church planting and we love God and the way he was providing so we gave our last five dollars. After that service I was called over by one of the leaders in our district and was given a Pentecostal Handshake, that wonderful institution where the Spirit inspires someone to pass some cash along with the peace of a handshake. As if we needed further proof that God was taking care of us, I found in my hand five $5 bills, completely replacing the money that we had gotten rid of already! We were being blessed by a photographer with royalty free professional photos on a cd so we in turn blessed him with $20 of our money. I tell you we just couldn’t get rid of the stuff. To our surprise Dave Williams then made good on his ridiculous promise to give us some money. So we were then able to go out to dinner on a crisp $100 bill and put another $50 in the offering! We really couldn’t out give God as much as we tried. It was fun to try. I felt the joy of St. Francis dancing through the woods in nothing but a hair shirt having thrown even the clothes off his back down at his father’s feet. “Now I can truly pray, ‘My Father in Heaven,’” he said.

Dave talked about his early days in ministry as we prepared to take up that last offering. He talked about how God had challenged him to be generous. He was making almost nothing, but he decided to tithe to the district, then tithe again to his church and then give to missions before spending the rest. I laughed out loud and leaned over to Elaine and whispered, “That is ridiculous!” Ridiculous and fabulous! God had only in the last few weeks challenged us to the same thing! What fun this adventure is. O for the day when we can finally give it all away! And we can live free, in the joyful asceticism.

Delight at District Council

Reflections of district council:

One of most meaningful aspects of District Council to me is the honoring of the saints who have gone before us. We may be of a tradition that does not understand or appreciate veneration of Saints, still we understand what it means to be a saint, and delight in the legacy that the heroes of the faith leave us.

The banquet on Tuesday night honors the saints who have been ordained ministers for 50 years. This year among the others our former General Superintendent, Tom Trask was also honored. Norm Muhling was honored as well as he prepared to leave the district office for retirement. With heart felt enthusiasm we applauded each with a standing ovation. My heart swelled with gratitude each time I stood applauding the life and faithfulness of these saints. My face must have beamed as I delighted in them. Norm said that this was the closest thing to hearing his own funeral eulogies that he had experienced. I chuckled, but looking back the feeling I had that night was much like the times I have knelt by a casket and meditated on the life of the one commended to God.

Ovations continued throughout the week as gratitude would well up with in us for saints we love dearly. We honored those ordained for forty years, we honored Bro. Leach’s love and leadership to our district and Bro. Trask’s years of service at headquarters. I could tell Elaine was getting a little tired of standing up so often, but I wasn’t, my heart would stand and clap much longer for those who showed the way, for those who love us with their ministry. At times they seemed embarrassed, at others moved to tears.

Thursday night it was our turn. Elaine and I were ordained Thursday, both of us. One of the things I love about the Michigan District is the way that, from our first introduction to the leaders of the district, we have felt like they actually cared about us. Jeff Kennedy said, “Of course, that is because we do.” I have felt like they have taken a personal interest in us, like they delight in us. Who are we to receive such love, such interest? Are we rising stars in the Assemblies of God? Are we success personified? Hardly! I have a suspicion that our leaders love all of us, they look on all of us with delight. Still under their gaze I feel like a star, I feel successful. I love it.

Well, Thursday night all of us being ordained were in the front row. I’d catch a glimpse of the eyes of our leaders. They were watching us worship, beaming, taking genuine delight in us! I wondered, like a child, caught up in their delight. Then I thought of The Father in heaven delighting over his children, dancing over us! They weren’t alone. Again the congregation swelled in gratitude. Perhaps it was the joy of a fresh bunch of saints being consecrated to ministry, we beginning the adventure those Tuesday night have nearly completed, but they stood and applauded us. I truly hope that those who I have stood and applauded this week also knew the feeling of delight that we had in them.

Thank you, Father, for taking delight in us. Thank you for your saints, this wonderful family that you have given us. Thank you for the grace you gave those who have finished strong. Help us too. May 2058 find us faithful, if not already home.