Yesterday we made the adventurous journey from Michigan to Chicago. Our eight week sabbatical begins with a stay with the Community of The Holy Trinity, an intentional community living in a Lutheran parsonage lovingly called the 'Nidge. Packing for several weeks is an exercise in the discipline of simplicity. We packed sparingly but we were still cramped. Before leaving Michigan we bought groceries to bring with us, so that everyone besides the driver (*me) was buried in.
We are trusting God as we embark on this adventure. We trust God will provide our every need and meet the needs of our congregation as we are gone as well. We have no money. Yet we trust God to make a way. It will be exciting to see how God provides.
As we prayed and prepared to leave during the first week of our sabbatical, Elaine felt that we needed to trust God for $5000! That is crazy. (God is crazy.) We feel sure God directed us to take this sabbatical and believe that God will provide for it. Not only that, but as Elaine was praying she felt God didn't want us to worry about money and that having $5000 would make that possible. We shall see how God works it out. We have been blessed with a few hundred so far.
Showing posts with label Trust. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Trust. Show all posts
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Solitude and Community
I value deep relationships. I desire to know and be known in the secret places. Nouwen insists that everyone needs a place that remains hidden and we are often too quick to reveal the inner workings of our lives. I find that difficult to understand. Transparency is a downright discipline for me, and I agree with Nouwen that that which is most intimate is the most universal. Yet, Nouwen also displays an intense desire for community like I do. Nouwen’s life and body of work demonstrates a relentless drive to integration. How then does he integrate the hidden solitary place with a robust community?
Structuring Solitude
I value depth of relationship so much! I long to enter into life giving soul-level conversation with people I meet. I have often felt it ironic that, for me, beginning a relationship is difficult. The shallow small talk causes me to stumble and gives me enough pause to avoid beginning a relationship.
Structuring Solitude
I value depth of relationship so much! I long to enter into life giving soul-level conversation with people I meet. I have often felt it ironic that, for me, beginning a relationship is difficult. The shallow small talk causes me to stumble and gives me enough pause to avoid beginning a relationship.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Detachment at the Dealership
The loan specialist from Wells Fargo looked at us, his eyes and knit brows conveyed something like, “you’re crazy.” I imagine he thought of us as his own kids and was offering us the help and advice he would offer them.
We had gone to our local car dealership to see what we had won. They had sent out cards to all the postal customers with a prize, we could win a car, at flat screen tv, or a gas card (we won the gas card, odds - 1:1). It was just for fun. We decided while we were there we’d price out some vehicles and see what it would take. Our ’98 Grand Caravan has 194,000 miles on it, so the thought of replacing it has crossed our minds.
As they worked hard to get us into a used Impala, the reality of our budget became clear.
“So basically your ideal monthly payment would be zero…”
“Well that would fit our budget.” Elaine replied. The loan officer shook his head.
“Your van has nearly 200,000 miles on it. You are on borrowed time. What are you going to do when it breaks down. It is really time to think of another car,” he said with a fatherly tone in his voice.
“Well,” Elaine started, “You’re going to think we’re crazy, but God has given us the last four cars we have had, so we figure when this one goes, he’ll give us another one.”
“God’s just going to give you a car?!” And just as if he was frustrated with his children the loan officer found a way out of the room and threw his hands up, no doubt thinking how irresponsible our attitude was.
Well, look at what we make as pastors. There is just no way we could afford a payment and full insurance on a new car. We are completely dependent on God’s provision. He got us into this mess, he’ll get us out of it too.
Mary Albert Darling in The God of intimacy and Action, writes that asceticism when done well helps us to get beyond the things that distract us and allows all the things of the world to “hang lightly on us.” Detachment is a powerful thing. I appreciate that I don’t own the house we live in, it belongs to the church, it is God’s. In a way our car is the same. He gave it to us. It hangs lightly on us. I would like to get the odometer to a quarter of a million miles, but when it finally dies we know God will provide.
Thomas A’Kempis also strikes this chord.
We are learning detachment to our things and our desires just as Father Fillaret learns it in this clip from the Russian film, “The Island”
We had gone to our local car dealership to see what we had won. They had sent out cards to all the postal customers with a prize, we could win a car, at flat screen tv, or a gas card (we won the gas card, odds - 1:1). It was just for fun. We decided while we were there we’d price out some vehicles and see what it would take. Our ’98 Grand Caravan has 194,000 miles on it, so the thought of replacing it has crossed our minds.
As they worked hard to get us into a used Impala, the reality of our budget became clear.
“So basically your ideal monthly payment would be zero…”
“Well that would fit our budget.” Elaine replied. The loan officer shook his head.
“Your van has nearly 200,000 miles on it. You are on borrowed time. What are you going to do when it breaks down. It is really time to think of another car,” he said with a fatherly tone in his voice.
“Well,” Elaine started, “You’re going to think we’re crazy, but God has given us the last four cars we have had, so we figure when this one goes, he’ll give us another one.”
“God’s just going to give you a car?!” And just as if he was frustrated with his children the loan officer found a way out of the room and threw his hands up, no doubt thinking how irresponsible our attitude was.
Well, look at what we make as pastors. There is just no way we could afford a payment and full insurance on a new car. We are completely dependent on God’s provision. He got us into this mess, he’ll get us out of it too.
Mary Albert Darling in The God of intimacy and Action, writes that asceticism when done well helps us to get beyond the things that distract us and allows all the things of the world to “hang lightly on us.” Detachment is a powerful thing. I appreciate that I don’t own the house we live in, it belongs to the church, it is God’s. In a way our car is the same. He gave it to us. It hangs lightly on us. I would like to get the odometer to a quarter of a million miles, but when it finally dies we know God will provide.
Thomas A’Kempis also strikes this chord.
When a man desires a thing too much, he at once becomes ill at ease. A proud and avaricious man never rests, whereas he who is poor and humble of heart lives in a world of peace. An unmortified man is quickly tempted and overcome in small trifling evils; his spirit is weak, in a measure carnal and inclined to sensual things; he can hardly abstain from earthly desires. Hence it makes him sad to forego them; he is quick to anger if reproved. Yet if he satisfies his desires, remorse of conscience overwhelms him because he followed his passions and they did not lead to the peace he sought. True peace of heart, then, is found in resisting passions, not in satisfying them. There is no peace in the carnal man, in the man given to vain attractions, but there is peace in the fervent and spiritual man (Imitation of Christ book 1, chapter 6).In our experience at the car dealership we tasted both of the conditions A’Kempis speaks about. We were poor and in a place of humility by the grace of God. We are also carnal, and test driving the cars felt good. The assessment of our budget left us feeling depressed - the hopelessness of ever satisfying those desires on our own power.
We are learning detachment to our things and our desires just as Father Fillaret learns it in this clip from the Russian film, “The Island”
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Saint Francis and saint Trask
Foster himself places St. Francis squarely in the Charismatic stream, citing him as a prime historical example. “I commend Francis of Assisi to you as a model of charismatic jubilee” (106). Jubilee sums up the beautiful sense of joy found in St. Francis. From Le Jongleur de Dieu to whimsical songs to brother Sun and moon, to his own child like wonder and perpetually simple faith, joy filled the Franciscan spirit. It was also jubilee in the sense of the freedom. The emancipation from the dark ages, and the freedom granted in supernatural works. His was a strange mix of celebration and asceticism -- they found their home together in his constant practice of simplicity. Simplicity as Foster notes brings freedom and joy.
From the horrors of war, a year of captivity and a year of convalescence stirred and transformed something deep within Francis. His family and friends may well have seen it as a break with reality, for he through off the imposed reality of this world with the clothes off his back and began a quest to enter fully into the reality of the Kingdom of God. Foster notes his longing for transformation, quoting his poem to the virtues:
Francis was gregarious and influenced by the wandering troubadours and jugglers who entertained from town to town. Even as a young man and a soldier, Chesterton notes, “Francis was one of those people who are popular with everybody in any case; and his guileless swagger as a Troubadour and leader of French fashions made him a sort of romantic ringleader around town” (41). That is his transformation wasn’t in his character as much as in whom he served. As he through himself into the service of God with characteristic abandon, he traded French fashions for a hair shirt, but he remained a ringleader, romantic toward God and His creation, and a Jongleur de Dieu.
With beauty Chesterton describes the time and world of Francis. The world was emerging from the dark ages, a time of penance and purging from pagan naturalism. St. Francis emerged into a world that was clean and ready to receive his songs of praise for creation and her Creator. His joyful asceticism was a release from the harsh practices of the previous age. H e renounced the emerging wealth of the renaissance with an adventurous and generous spirit. He fought in the crusades not with an army, but alone with God, hoping to convert the radical Islamists. On his return he found even his own movement too tame, beginning to own property, albeit in common.
Francis is also an example of the incarnational life. He valued the material world and the ways he could see God in the world around him. As my friend Ken notes, Francis saw the wonder and miracle in the world around him. Is it any wonder then that the miraculous followed him? Francis seemed to see the world through spiritual eyes. He could identify the wonders and miracles in the world around, he could see creation as brother and sister. In his simplicity and holy foolishness, he saw the reality of the Kingdom around him. In his mind there may not have been much dividing the natural from the supernatural. His life was the adventure of the true Kingdom invading the world of men, so he had to live according to the values of that Kingdom come what may.
This week we were on our own mendicant adventure with a Franciscan flavor, trusting God for our every need. We went to our District Council without any money to rely on. There in the midst of God’s wonderful provision for us, I found great joy celebrating the lives of saints who had persevered in ministry. Allow me to submit one such saint as a further example of the Charismatic stream, Thomas E. Trask.
Tom Trask celebrated his fiftieth year as an ordained minister this week. Until last summer he served as General Superintendent for the Assemblies of God in the United States. He is a consummate preacher, though not using the method of expository preaching I value most. His preaching relies entirely on the anointing of the Spirit. Prayer and a spiritual reading of the text is important to him as he prepares.
He lived the adventure of ministry that my family is enjoying now. He planted a church in Northern Minnesota in 1956. He made no money as the church’s pastor, so he had to work. His father, also a minister in Minnesota, told him to get a job that was simple enough that he could do while still focussing on God - on his call.
He began to work for a Jewish businessman, W.R. Feldman. After struggling through months of slim income, Fledman approached Trask. “I’ll pay for your management training, if you come back to work for me,” he said, offering a large salary.
Trask said he would pray about it. Fledman was incredulous, “Pray about what? I know what they’re paying you!”
Trask responded, “The church is not my boss, God is my boss.” After praying Trask felt he had no option but to turn Feldman down, believing that he had been “bought with a price.”
Complete trust in God for his financial security combined with a discipline of giving, giving him experiences like St. Francis. One thanksgiving he had no food for his family. He didn’t have money for groceries, but in desperation he got in to his car to head to the store. As he was pulling out a man in a pickup truck pulled in behind him.
“Are you that pastor, Trask?” He asked. When Trask said yes, he said, “I have something you will need for tomorrow.” He proceeded to take two bags of groceries out of the back of his truck. Trask never saw the man before or since, convinced that angels sometimes dive pickups.
Giving continues to be an important discipline for him. As he rose in the ranks of the church and made more money, he increased his giving, until last year he was able to give away %70 of his income. Though he can also strangely value nice cars and manicured lawns as evidence of God’s provision to those around us.
Early in his ministry an older minister told him, “Tom, ask God to put you on a schedule and keep that schedule.” Rising early to engage in disciplines of prayer and study became important for him through out his life, as did “creating a family altar.” He recalled as a child his parents gathering the family before school and praying, “God keep Tom, keep Roy, Keep Patty.” Such times of prayer and worship with his family were important disciplines for him.
Looking back on his 52 years of ministry, Trask says, “Enjoy the adventure, because it was meant to be enjoyed.”
The faithfulness of Saint Francis and saint Trask in the adventure of the kingdom is a great inspiration to me. Like Francis this week I have been challenged to give and entirely trust in God for my family’s provision. It has been wonderful to see him work in us. Dropping the last of our money in the offering plate and then seeing God replenish that amount or give even more for us to give has been hilarious and wonderful. I can appreciate the joy of Francis as he danced naked through the forest, free from possessions but rich in God.
As Elaine and I were Ordained this year, the example of those who have gone before has been powerful as well. I appreciate Tom Trask’s example of faithfulness and demonstration of how this heroic trust and that we can actually make it through the adventure. After we were ordained, and hands laid on us symbolically passing the anointing, Tom Trask kissed my cheek. I accept from the Spirit Trask’s blessing.
From the horrors of war, a year of captivity and a year of convalescence stirred and transformed something deep within Francis. His family and friends may well have seen it as a break with reality, for he through off the imposed reality of this world with the clothes off his back and began a quest to enter fully into the reality of the Kingdom of God. Foster notes his longing for transformation, quoting his poem to the virtues:
Hail, Queen Wisdom! May the Lord preserve you
With your sister holy pure Simplicity!
O lady holy Poverty, may the Lord save you
With your sister holy Humility!
O lady holy Charity, may the Lord save you
With your sister holy Obedience
O al you most holy virtues,
May the Lord save you all,
From Whom you come and proceed (Foster 104).
Francis was gregarious and influenced by the wandering troubadours and jugglers who entertained from town to town. Even as a young man and a soldier, Chesterton notes, “Francis was one of those people who are popular with everybody in any case; and his guileless swagger as a Troubadour and leader of French fashions made him a sort of romantic ringleader around town” (41). That is his transformation wasn’t in his character as much as in whom he served. As he through himself into the service of God with characteristic abandon, he traded French fashions for a hair shirt, but he remained a ringleader, romantic toward God and His creation, and a Jongleur de Dieu.
With beauty Chesterton describes the time and world of Francis. The world was emerging from the dark ages, a time of penance and purging from pagan naturalism. St. Francis emerged into a world that was clean and ready to receive his songs of praise for creation and her Creator. His joyful asceticism was a release from the harsh practices of the previous age. H e renounced the emerging wealth of the renaissance with an adventurous and generous spirit. He fought in the crusades not with an army, but alone with God, hoping to convert the radical Islamists. On his return he found even his own movement too tame, beginning to own property, albeit in common.
Francis is also an example of the incarnational life. He valued the material world and the ways he could see God in the world around him. As my friend Ken notes, Francis saw the wonder and miracle in the world around him. Is it any wonder then that the miraculous followed him? Francis seemed to see the world through spiritual eyes. He could identify the wonders and miracles in the world around, he could see creation as brother and sister. In his simplicity and holy foolishness, he saw the reality of the Kingdom around him. In his mind there may not have been much dividing the natural from the supernatural. His life was the adventure of the true Kingdom invading the world of men, so he had to live according to the values of that Kingdom come what may.
This week we were on our own mendicant adventure with a Franciscan flavor, trusting God for our every need. We went to our District Council without any money to rely on. There in the midst of God’s wonderful provision for us, I found great joy celebrating the lives of saints who had persevered in ministry. Allow me to submit one such saint as a further example of the Charismatic stream, Thomas E. Trask.
Tom Trask celebrated his fiftieth year as an ordained minister this week. Until last summer he served as General Superintendent for the Assemblies of God in the United States. He is a consummate preacher, though not using the method of expository preaching I value most. His preaching relies entirely on the anointing of the Spirit. Prayer and a spiritual reading of the text is important to him as he prepares.
He lived the adventure of ministry that my family is enjoying now. He planted a church in Northern Minnesota in 1956. He made no money as the church’s pastor, so he had to work. His father, also a minister in Minnesota, told him to get a job that was simple enough that he could do while still focussing on God - on his call.
He began to work for a Jewish businessman, W.R. Feldman. After struggling through months of slim income, Fledman approached Trask. “I’ll pay for your management training, if you come back to work for me,” he said, offering a large salary.
Trask said he would pray about it. Fledman was incredulous, “Pray about what? I know what they’re paying you!”
Trask responded, “The church is not my boss, God is my boss.” After praying Trask felt he had no option but to turn Feldman down, believing that he had been “bought with a price.”
Complete trust in God for his financial security combined with a discipline of giving, giving him experiences like St. Francis. One thanksgiving he had no food for his family. He didn’t have money for groceries, but in desperation he got in to his car to head to the store. As he was pulling out a man in a pickup truck pulled in behind him.
“Are you that pastor, Trask?” He asked. When Trask said yes, he said, “I have something you will need for tomorrow.” He proceeded to take two bags of groceries out of the back of his truck. Trask never saw the man before or since, convinced that angels sometimes dive pickups.
Giving continues to be an important discipline for him. As he rose in the ranks of the church and made more money, he increased his giving, until last year he was able to give away %70 of his income. Though he can also strangely value nice cars and manicured lawns as evidence of God’s provision to those around us.
Early in his ministry an older minister told him, “Tom, ask God to put you on a schedule and keep that schedule.” Rising early to engage in disciplines of prayer and study became important for him through out his life, as did “creating a family altar.” He recalled as a child his parents gathering the family before school and praying, “God keep Tom, keep Roy, Keep Patty.” Such times of prayer and worship with his family were important disciplines for him.
Looking back on his 52 years of ministry, Trask says, “Enjoy the adventure, because it was meant to be enjoyed.”
The faithfulness of Saint Francis and saint Trask in the adventure of the kingdom is a great inspiration to me. Like Francis this week I have been challenged to give and entirely trust in God for my family’s provision. It has been wonderful to see him work in us. Dropping the last of our money in the offering plate and then seeing God replenish that amount or give even more for us to give has been hilarious and wonderful. I can appreciate the joy of Francis as he danced naked through the forest, free from possessions but rich in God.
As Elaine and I were Ordained this year, the example of those who have gone before has been powerful as well. I appreciate Tom Trask’s example of faithfulness and demonstration of how this heroic trust and that we can actually make it through the adventure. After we were ordained, and hands laid on us symbolically passing the anointing, Tom Trask kissed my cheek. I accept from the Spirit Trask’s blessing.
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