This morning as I was driving to our ministerial meeting I was full of the wonder of life. I said to God, "I am so glad you are in the world with me. You make it worth living," and other such romantic chit chat. Then my thoughts turned a little darker. How would I live with out him? What would my life be like if there was no God?
Today we went to a memorial service for Tom, Elaine's uncle. He committed suicide Thanksgiving day. He was an atheist. As I reflected on it, he really lived what he believed too. His life is how I would probably live if I didn't have my Divine Love.
Tom was a musician and a free spirit. He could pick up and go anywhere, love anyone, fulfill any apatite. He loved many women and kept them as friends when no longer lovers. He enjoyed his drugs and alcohol until two years ago, and why not? His friends at the memorial service were saddened by their loss of a truly unique and honest human being. They had only their memories to keep him alive.
In a way he is heroic. He looked death in the eyes and met it on his own terms. He had no fear of death, it was life that had become fearful. He lived his life well, just how I would hope to live without a God.
I say to God again, "Thank you for being here with me, for the grace of drawing me to you. Thank you for the grace to love you, the grace to stare life in the face with out fear. Thank you for the grace to gaze at death with hope. Please Lord, grant that grace to the wonderful bohemian friends that are mourning the loss of Tom. Amen"
How beautifully put!
ReplyDeleteExplain what you mean by suicide being heroic. "He lived his life well, just how I would hope to live with out a God." Alcoholism and serial sexual relationships you call a life lived well? Is this something you'll teach in your youth group? How irresponsible.
ReplyDeleteI don't think he's vsaying that suicide is heroic, just that the action of not fearing death is heroic. And he is saying that as a man that refused to believe in God, Tom lived the best he knew how. It's still sad that he lived such a life and did not trust God with his life. Then he probably wouldn't be dead right now. But, he loved people deeply. He was without hate. That is heroic, too. There are plenty of "Christians" who have lots of hate. But maybe you won't understand what we are saying since you didn't know him. He is hard to explain. It's so sad that he did what he did and didn't beleive in God.
ReplyDeleteWhat could be more heroic for an atheist? As the professor who spoke at Tom's memorial said, we are all hurtling toward death. Tom took it in to his own hands and met it on his own terms. What kind of morality would I have if I was an atheist? Much the same, I think. And that is the point of my post. I am simply imagining what kind of life could be lived with out God, and thanking him that that life is not mine.
ReplyDelete(BTW why do people think I have a youth group?)
LOL! Yeah a youth group would be nice, wouldn't it? In time, my dear, in time.
ReplyDeleteSo, do you (or the professor)think all atheists who stay alive and struggle through life's issues are less than heroic? That he thought since we're hurtling towards death anyway, let's get it all over with. How nihilist. That you bought into this is beyond me.
ReplyDeleteOK, let me pose the question differently: "IF you had a youth group would you teach this?" What if you had an impressionable teen in your group, one struggling at home with intense relational problems, not fitting in at school, would you pose this heroic scenario to him?
ReplyDeleteThis is no reflection on your uncle redheadrev. You're right, I didn't know him. (By the way, sorry for your loss.) But you are choosing to publish all this, and for me this has to do with swallowing the philosphy of this professor. I'm just saying it's incredible to me. I would not want my teen in a youth group (if you had one, i know) where the leader held such attitudes.
Let me be perfectly clear, a careful reading of this post would show that I do not believe those statements. I am imagining a world with out God, a world that doesn't exist.
ReplyDeleteIn fact those are the beliefs of the atheists at Tom's funeral. If I were an atheist I would find them logical beliefs. With out God what is left except nihilism? Really?
I do not have an atheist youth group and I am not a pastor of an atheist church, these things should be self evident. Of course I would not teach this to people in my charge, since I myself do not agree with these ideas. That is why I end the post thanking God that he does exist and life is more than epicurean extravagance that ends in despair.
I totally get it! after living through the same kind of thing, I thank HIM also for walking with me through this world, and for not allowing me to fear living..I understood your post, and it was written with the love that Jesus would have put in your heart. If my children were in your area, I would love for someone like you to lead them. Thanks for sharing your heart.
ReplyDeleteBlogger no longer lets wordpress post comments so here is the present blog 4evrhis.wordpress.com
Darla- thanks for the kind words. They mean much to me!
ReplyDeleteSorry, Darla. I disagree. The motivation may have been good, but the content was way off.
ReplyDeleteIf you've ever stood before a group of high schoolers who just lost a friend to suicide, you'd want to be pretty clear, crystal clear that this is not the way one deals with life's problems. The inner triggers are too sensitive to speak in such high, esoteric language. The aftermath of such action is too painful for those left behind for me to gloss over it.
Sorry, I guess we can agree to disagree.